On January 29, 2024 heaven gained a one-of-a-kind.
Pap had eyes that would twinkle and he was always greeting you with a smile, whether you were family or just meeting him for the first time. He loved people and their company, and he was always ready to tell a story.
He had a charm that you knew about even if you had never met him.
I can remember when I first joined No Bad Juju, long before Joe and I started dating, Joe was always talking about his Pap. I couldn't wait to meet him! And then I became lucky enough to be a part of his family and experience his love for 7 years.
I'm so grateful to have met him and to have shared so many wonderful memories with him.
Pap and I had our birthdays two days apart and would always celebrate them together. This year he turned 97.
97!
The man didn't just live to be 97. He thrived to see 97.
William J. Kole, author of The Big 100: The New World of Super-Aging, writes in his book that three simple longevity habits are:
1. A positive attitude
2. Purpose
3. Faith
These three habits could (or do) overlap The Blue Zone Guidelines (areas of the world where people live longer than average) of a healthy lifestyle, which are:
1. Have a purpose
2. Move your body
3. Reduce stress
4. Don't eat until you're full
5. Eat more plant-based foods
6. Put your family first
7. Surround yourself with the right people
8. Wine in moderation
9. A sense of belonging
Pap, no doubt, had a positive attitude. He was always "terrific" when you asked how he was. He never complained, even during his final days. He was always happy and grateful to be around loved ones and to simply live life.
He had a purpose. He had a great love for his family and a curiosity to learn more about the world.
And the man had faith unlike any other. After all, his namesake was John Baptist.
My word of the year is "inspire." But Pap inspired me with the way he lived life. I hope that I can do him justice by sharing with you how his Circle of Life thrived for him to see 97 healthy years, so that you may be inspired to live your best life well into your 90s and beyond.
SPIRITUALITY - As previously mentioned, the man had faith unlike any other. He was devoted to his faith his entire life. He helped start a CCD program and volunteered at his church in his younger years. Even when he could no longer drive, he "attended" mass daily through the Archdiocese of Toronto, and would receive weekly communion from a friend that would deliver it to him. He kept a prayer book and said daily prayers.
CREATIVITY - Pap had a positive attitude and would never get discouraged. When he could no longer leave the house on his own, he brought the world to him. He found ways to go to mass. He found ways to "travel." He found ways to get in some daily movement. And he loved to tell the story about how he made up a game (similar to horseshoes) for him and his neighbors to play when they were youngsters.
FINANCES - He had everything squared away. He had no debts. He donated to the church and lived within his means.
CAREER - Pap loved people. And people loved Pap. He spent a majority of his career as a barber. At his viewing, I overheard someone say that his barber shop was always full with people - whether they were customers or just hanging out. He had community in his career.
EDUCATION - When Pap was in tenth grade he told his principal that he didn't need to go to school anymore - that he knew everything already. So, he left and went to work for, I believe, Western Union delivering telegrams. However, thanks to Nana, he eventually went and got his GED. And then the man never stopped learning! He took a class on computers and eventually his laptop became his lifeline. When he could no longer travel, he would pull out his laptop and explore a different country. He loved learning about their architecture, culture, and cuisine.
HEALTH - This might sound shocking, but the man never stayed in a hospital. He was diagnosed with congestive heart failure a few years ago, and though he took some medication for it, he never did anything extensive. He was "good with it" and wanted to continue living life the only way he knew how. And he was mentally healthy, which I'm sure had a lot to do with his never-ending education and constant social support. It would also be unfair for me not to include this - A few years ago on his birthday I asked him what the secret was. His response was, "Hydrogen peroxide. I rinse my mouth with it every day and I have all my teeth." God bless him! Also, he had a small glass of red wine every night for dinner. So, you be the judge!
PHYSICAL ACTIVITY - Pap was a very active man and his favorite form of exercise was simply walking. I would hear stories about how he would go to Joe and Maria's school and walk the track during school and wave to them as he made his laps. Even when he gave up driving and had a walker, he would do laps around the house. He was walking himself to the dinner table two days before his passing. Never stop moving.
HOME COOKING - Let me tell you something. Pap was spoiled. (And I mean that in the most sincerest way possible!) He was fortunate enough to have his daughter care for him and provide him warm meals every day. And I'm not talking about heated takeout food. He was eating real home-cooked food every day.
HOME ENVIRONMENT - Pap was also fortunate that he got to live with his daughter. And it wasn't that he moved in once he "couldn't provide for himself." My husband grew up with his grandparents living under the same roof. How cool is that? Pap had his own suite where he could live comfortably and thankfully he never had to go to a facility to live out his final years.
RELATIONSHIPS - Pap adored Nana. I'm sad that I never got to meet her, but the way he talked about her made me feel like I got to know a piece of her. And he would tell me that he "talked" to her every night. He had a strong relationship with his family. His family meant the world to him. It's funny. Pap was a single child, but he was never alone. Not ever. That should tell you enough about the kind of relationships that he had.
SOCIAL LIFE - As just stated, the man was never alone. When he was able to drive, he was taking trips with Nana and meeting new people on their cruises or having weekly breakfasts with guys from the Knights of Columbus. He was blessed to be surrounded by family and neighbors (that he referred to as family) that would randomly pop in for a chat over a cup of coffee. He made strong relationships with his caregivers. And the man was on Facebook! I love telling people that my favorite birthday greeting was a text from my husband's 97-year-old grandfather. He never let his age stop him from living in this day and age.
JOY - The man lived for joy. That was his purpose. He loved his wife. He loved his family. He loved his faith. He loved to travel. He loved to learn. He loved being active and using his mind. He loved people. He found joy in every day, even when it might have seemed difficult to do so.
Of course, your Circle of Life perspective will differ from Pap's. But I hope you can see how his genuine love for living helped him to not only see 97 years, but to live 97 years of life.
May you be inspired to find joy in every day living as much as I have.
Thank you, Pap.
